• University of North Texas

• BUSI 3660

BUSI 3660 Section ______ Name: ___________________

Professional Communication

Practical Exercise #10: Bad-News Messages

Part 1. Sentence Editing

Revise the following sentences to present the information positively. Use positive or neutral language. (2 points each)

1. We cannot offer free shipping for orders under $100.

Free shipping is available for orders over $100.

We offer free shipping for orders over $100.

Remove “cannot” = 1 pt.

Correct grammar and punctuation = 1 pt.

2. Unfortunately we cannot afford to continue the program, so we will conclude it on May 1.

The program will conclude on May 1.

Due to budgetary restrictions, the program will conclude on May 1.

Remove “unfortunately” = 0.5 pt.

Remove “cannot” = 0.5 pt.

Correct grammar and punctuation = 1 pt.

Revise the following sentence to present the bad news with passive-voice verbs. (2 points each)

1. We are postponing indefinitely requests for company tours.

Requests for company tours are (indefinitely) postponed.

Correct use of passive voice = 1 pt.

Correct grammar and punctuation = 1 pt.

2. This hospital has a strict policy of not admitting patients until we have verified their insurance

coverage.

Patients are admitted after their insurance coverage has been verified.

The hospital (only) admits patients with verified insurance coverage.

The hospital has a strict policy of admitting patients after their insurance has been verified.

Correct use of passive voice = 1 pt.

Correct grammar and punctuation = 1 pt.

Revise the following groups of sentences to position the bad news in a subordinate clause. Your revised sentences will be clear and concise. (2 points each)

3. The following question and answer appeared on a shoe company website. Only revise the

answer that the company provided. Do not revise the customer’s question.

Question: Do you plan on offering this shoe in a C? If not, how does it compare? I normally order a 7.5 W from you. Carla R.